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MasterChugs Theater: ‘House of the Dead’
Awful April begins, and boy do we have a doozy. German director Uwe Boll is one of the few to succeed in making most people cower in terror. Sadly, not because the movie we’re gonna take a look at is a...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘Juwanna Mann’
Awful April continues, and frankly folks, it doesn’t exactly get better from here. We’ve got another stinker from the past decade-which, honestly, is odd. You would think that by now, more than a...
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MasterChugs Theater: ‘Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li’
The original Street Fighter, the Jean Claude Van Damme/Kylie Minogue/Ming Na vehicle that managed to kill the great Raul Julia, is not a good movie. It never was, and anyone that thought it was is a...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘I Know Who Killed Me’
I Know Who Killed Me feels like a deliberate exercise in cinematic ineptitude. When movies are released theatrically, they carry with them an obligation to at least appear professional and possess some...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘Cursed’
Even a man who is pure at heart And says his prayers by night Can become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms And the autumn moon is bright… …or you can take the unique approach of not having that man (or...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘American Ninja’
Annnnnnd we’re back. See, we gave you a special edition of MasterChugs Theater last week in order help celebrate the birthday of SeriouslyGuys. But now, it’s back to the grind. Quality movies like you...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘American Ninja 2′
The original American Ninja introduced us to Michael Dudikoff as a blond-haired, blue-eyed U.S. soldier skilled in the arts of ninjitsu. In all ways it was an action movie that represented the decade...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘American Ninja 4′
Your eyes do not deceive you: we’re reviewing American Ninja 4: The Annihilation before American Ninja 3. See, there’s a logic for that-Our Lord Dudikoff never made an appearance in the third movie of...
View ArticleMasterChugs Theater: ‘Latitude Zero’
The movie reviews are back, and, oh, look what month it is. That’s right-we’re looking at March, which almost always results in taking a glance at the worst movies ever made. Coincidentally enough, my...
View ArticleBrains later, mended bones now
The Resident Evil movies haven’t exactly been great. While they’re not truly atrocious, they’re definitely not good, but the only pain that the films have inflicted upon the masses has been purely of...
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